Doctor's visit

I thought this was an interesting story. I had an appointment yesterday with our family doctor to get my Hepatitis's shot. It a father and son doctors office, I have always had my appointments with the son. Well this time I get the father and boy what an experience. I go back into the office and he says what are you here for. I tell him I am traveling to China hopefully in the next year. I show him the info Living Hope has giving us on what shots we should get. I tell him I want to get hep A, but don't think that i want to get Hep B. Well I get a sermon like no other. For a minute I felt like I was back in grade school at the principles office. He goes on to tell me every way possible that I could get Hep B. One which was a graphic explanation that someday I could get into a car accident start bleeding everywhere and if someone tried to help me and they were bleeding everywhere are blood could mix and get into my open wombs. I proceed to tell him I am only considering getting these shots because we are traveling, if I was not going to china i wouldn't even consider either one. Well he says I do whatever you want but you should get both. I don't think he was to happy with me that I just to get one and not the other. So now he gets out the needle and I think boy am I in a world of trouble. But surprisingly he was very gentle and it really didn't hurt at all, just felt a little burn. I did say out loud I am a bit of Sissy when it comes to needles and his reply was it really is mind over matter (in a very sarcastic way). I am hoping that he really had a bad day and this is not his usually bed side manor. I have to go back in six months so i will see if her is any nicer. But for anyone considering getting the shot it really was not big deal. for about 2 seconds it felt a little warm sensation and then went away. Today my upper arm is a little sore. the soreness is really just to touch nothing to uncomfortable.

Christmas holdiay

Well Christmas day if officially over. Back to work today. This season I have felt completely different then ever before. I was extra generous to my family and strangers. After the 2 feet of snow hit my husband and I were driving home from my parents and drove past a car stuck in the snow. Normally we would of kept on driving (for many reasons one being is this just sick person pretending to be stuck just to rob us). Well we pulled into a plowed stop and went on to help this older man and women push their car onto a clear spot. They could not have thanked us enough. I really felt great about doing this. Every time I saw a red cross container I put money in, normally I walk right pass (again i aways felt is the red cross really getting this money). Not this year. I felt very giving, happy and just generous. Their are many other stories I could post about what i did different this year then ever before but I guess my point is, I have love in my heart for a daughter I haven't even met yet. I want everyone around me to feet the same kind of love and happiness. I know other parents feel this way, but I guess because I have never felt this before I didn't quite understand just how great it is . I think because I have so much love inside of me by being extra nice people will feel this way. I am not saying I never did anything nice before but I did different nice things this year for different reasons. Our nephew on my husband side has had a tough life, lots of ups and downs and lot of loss in his short 13 years of life. He could be quite a handful at times and I loose my patience with him sometimes or don't give him the attention he deserves because he is being bad or giving us an attitude. Well this year when I walk into his house I just couldn't help but hug him and give him a kiss (something I normally don't do when I see him). He could of not been more thankful for his gifts and loved everything we gave him. For the first time in the 5 years I have known him I told him I loved him. While I have been there for him and done little things for him and made sure he always had a nice Christmas' and birthdays, i never told him I loved him. Well in return he told me he loved me and gave the biggest hug and kiss. and it felt great and sad all at the same time. I felt sad because I think he yeaned this from me, I kinda like a mother figure to him. He lost his mom and grandmom and don't really have a lot of women in his life. I feel different towards him now. I really think these feeling come from us adopting. I really feel like God has givin a special blessing by allowing us to adopt a child and I have a new respect for children. I hope this feeling never goes away and only gets stronger. My hope is everyone in the world feels this great and maybe someday we won't be reading headlines in the morning paper that someone tried to bomb a plane flying over the United states.

Special Needs Program

Well today is the official day me and Ryan submitted our paperwork to Living Hope to be in the special needs program. I deleted my last post because one I would like to have happy posts in here in case someday our daughter would like to read this and two I was mad the last time I wrote and would just like to forget about what I wrote. One thing I need to learn after being with my husband for 5 years now is he does not make decision overnight. He likes to ponder get educated and take time for himself to make decisions. I should know this by now after many major decisions we have to make since we meet. this is how he has handle each and every one of them. My patience sometimes wears thin and I get upset or frustrated and I need to take a breath and remember all good things come to those who wait. Well we discussed and spoke to Doctors about what needs that would work for us and agreed on three with one maybe. Sarah seemed pretty optimistic that we would here something in the next 6 months. She went over the process and made us feel good about our decision. I felt a little nervous and anxious today. I woke up today and for the first time since we started this process it felt real. I could be a mom sooner than later. It really feels real now. Now that we have some kind of time line and knowledge of things it really feels real now. I think my mom was going to bust when I told her how she might have a little grandchild by next year. I bought a couple things today that I saw at Khol's today that were to cute I couldn't pass them up.
My friend Greg who is one of my oldest and closest friends just had his first baby last week. Sarah Jean Schubert was born Thurs. Dec 10 weighing only 5lbs 14 oz. She is so cute. So so tiny. I went and visited them today and got to hold her. I told him I am available to babysit anytime. Of course I must of bought them a million outfits, one cuter then the other. I can't wait till I can go out and start buying out daughter cute little outfits.
Well Christmas is right around the corner and I almost done my shopping. I have my parents done, my nephews done but have no idea on what to get my sister. to make matters worse her birthday is new years day. so i have to think of something to get her for Christmas and her birthday. Anyone have any ideas.
Our tree is done, and if i might say so myself it looks pretty good. One thing I love is decorate a Christmas tree. My husband thinks I am nuts I have about 700 lights on the tree and all kinds of balls and poinsettias and twigs, he asked is better living and homes coming to house anytime soon.